Stuck in a Hairy Situation

**Not a travel story. Instead, a waxing story.. or not waxing as it turns out, due to the COVID-19 pandemic and the Australian Government's new restrictions...

This is not a serious political commentary, I’ve stayed away from commenting on government policies and directives. So no, THIS is a light-hearted observation I made. And I would like to address the now-hairy elephant in the room.

Yes, I’m talking haircuts being an essential service. No, I don’t have a problem with the government allowing the services to continue; I think it’s great that a whole community of people won’t have to lose their livelihoods like so many others have… but essential? Hmmmm. I made the comment on a friends post yesterday that a fanny wax was far more essential in my opinion. I was kidding, but it got me to thinking… I won’t be getting a haircut while this shit is going down, mainly because I don’t think it’s worth the risk to other’s safety. I absolutely would love to keep giving my money to the hairdresser, because I think they are amazing. But equally, I think my wax lady is amazing. If waxes were still being allowed, I also wouldn’t be getting one done (sorry Dommo), for the same reasons as above.

I understand that that is a person’s entire income in some cases, and that their financial future is now uncertain. I’m sure most people are thinking that way right now – I certainly am. But I’d rather be alive and stacking shelves at a supermarket than being dead. Or worse, being the reason someone else died. Especially a loved one. But anyway, enough of that heavy shit – here’s what I think about getting a wax done.

It fucking hurts. The ruling the government backtracked on was for a half-hour time limit on appointments at hairdressers. Who in the shit wants their foof wax to go on for more than half an hour? Psychos, that’s who. And we don’t need those kind of people around hot wax.

I dunno about the other ladies here (and possibly gents – they wax too – and good for you if you do, have a chat to my husband if you can - ta), but my appointments certainly don’t take more than half an hour! Like, what kind of situation is going on down there if your wax takes an hour?! Not judging, but I don’t think I could handle more than half an hour of wax being applied to the holiest of holies. Seriously. Maybe my wax lady is just really damn fast? Not sure, I don’t generally discuss wax times with other people, but now I’m intrigued…

And here’s the other thing – the area being waxed, is at the OPPOSITE end to your face. They’re already wearing gloves, and I’m pretty sure they’d be happy to have an excuse to finally don a face mask, without you getting offended. And I’ll happily wear a face mask. Hell, I’ll put the pillow over my face if they want, it’ll help stifle the screams, so – win-win. I’ll even bring my own pillow (I know that would actually be worse…)

Anyways. That’s all. I’m not advocating for anything, either way. So please don’t get your short and curlies in a twist. And if you do – you’re shit outta luck, because the beauty salons are shut.